I am Who I am... PERIOD

So, I think I am coming out of this feeling....

    I know you might be thinking what feeling? Looking puzzled huh? Well I have been kind of feeling down... because I am starting 100% over in life... With MY LIFE... Like I am single out of a over four year relationship... and Basically since I have been living on my own, I was with my EX... So I never really lived on my own for real... So I accomplished a lot of things, WE ACCOMPLISHED a lot of things together...

BUT NOW I am starting over 100% and I am going to be accomplishing a lot of things on my own... I did not look at it like that at first.. I was just so caught up in everything I lost, and how I built it all that my ego was hurt! I felt like my ego took a big hit!!!

     Now I have realized that at some point in every one's life we have to stop and ask for help. No matter how independent we are we have all received some sort of help along the way rather it was BIG OR SMALL we have received some help...  I was at a point where I felt as if since I did need some help I have failed as a person, as a role model as a being....

BUT THAT IS NOT THE CASE!!!! I did not fail as a person... I did fall! but I am getting right back up!!! 

I even thought that I should be right up and running within a few months... But there is a lot of things I need to take care of and I do not want to rush into anything! I want to take my time, and do everything the right way... SO this year I have been focused on what I need to do to make Ariell's Life better, and back on point.... I have been staying focused, and trying to do everything I need to do to get back right! and I will...

I do have goals and dead lines on when I want certain things done, and over by, and SOOOOO far everything has been going to plan!!!!

         On another note my baby Jade is a SENIOR this year!!! *tear* I am sooo proud of her! and I have been slacking in planning her open house, and preparing the things I need to, to make sure everything with graduation goes accordingly... SO I am kicking myself in the butt and I am getting it together!!! Today I will pick out the pictures for her Graduation Invitations, and her Open House Invitations!!! I could have order the invites from the school with her Senior stuff but they were so Formal and BLAN... I want her invites to be LOUD AND BRIGHT!!! because her personality is LOUD and BRIGHT... so that is what I am aiming for... I need to check into a few venues for her Open House as well! And I need to figure out where we are going to dinner after graduation! I am so excited, and proud of her I cannot wait for her to graduate!!!! Then off to COLLEGE... Well I am not quite sure if she is leaving right away or going to go locally for a while.. EITHER way she is DEF starting college right away!!!! 

VALENTINES DAY is coming!!!! It is my Uncle, and my Aunts Birthday as well! I am not to big on Valentine's day this year.... Normally every year I want to go all out and do something sweet and romantic.. but this year I'm not! I am going to have  a date with my LOVELY JADE!!! (my little sister) and I work that night... SO that sounds like a good day to me!!!!!

AUGUST 24th, 2013 !!!! Is my 23rd birthday! and this year I really wanna go big!! SO I have been checking into Venues to have a VIP spot at a club in Indiana, because my BEST FRIEND, and God Sister are there and they are whom I want to party with so I think it would be more fun to just go there... and it gets me out of town for the weekend!!! I also have been checking in to some Reality Stars hosting my party!!! As everyone knows I LOVE the BAD GIRLS CLUB!!! ;) so I am looking into a FEW BADDDD Girls to come and host my party... Have been talking back and forth to their booking agents... But nothing is set in stone with them because August is still so far away, and they can be doing anything come that time!!! but I am DEF working HARD to make it all happen for me this year!!! 

      So with all that being said this year is going to be a good year! I am sure of it!!! With the party thing, I will not pay or go all out on a party if other things are not taken care of so the party is like a motivational present to myself.... Like "Hey you worked hard, and handled business, Now party like a rock star!" We all need a little push, and we all deserve to treat ourselves every now and again.. there is nothing wrong with that!!!!!

Oh and I discovered, that I am loud, rude, and very judgmental, I mean I have known these poor qualities for  a while now... But I am also very big hearted, and I some times care more than I should... Either WAY I am me! and I am very proud of my STRUGGLE!!!!! because I am strong enough to get through anything, and I know this! I know I can!!!!


I LOVE ME!!!!


Thanks for reading :)