January 2014! Time to get RIGHT with MYSELF!!!

Everyone has their New Year resolutions, or their "New Year, New Me" spills. This year I told myself I would not partake in any of that! I do not want to set goals, that are not realistic, nor do I want to make promises to myself that I know I will not keep! So instead I have decided, that I am going to learn to become at peace within myself! It is something that I need to do! FOR ME!!! I have never been so excited to start any sort of process more than I am excited right now about starting this one!

 

Now, I have always said time, and time again that I would start saving. Yet I never seem to do it. I mean I come up with these plans "budget plans" to save, but somehow I fail them every time! I said somehow because at first I did not understand why I could make the perfect budget for everyone else, yet I couldn't make one for myself. NOW I ave realized in a budget you must include everything, like gas, food, medicine, pet expenses etc. My butt would just make a budget for saving, and my bills... then wonder why nothing every worked or why I never had food etc. I mean it is simple stuff that I left out because I did not think it would be that important to add... Well I am going to say that EVERYTHING you spend your money on NEEDS TO BE IN YOUR BUDGET (if your creating one) if not your budget will always fail like mine did! 

I have a lot coming up and a lot going on in these next few months so I want this budget to work so that I can handle what I need to and do what I need to financially! I am really taking this year and devoting all my hard earned pennies to getting my life back on track, I was focused, and then I got lost... NOW I AM MORE FOCUSED THAN EVER!!! Let ME TELL YOU IT IS OFFICIALLY GRIND TIME!!!! 

 Anyone who know's me well, KNOWS that I have been putting basically my life on hold to lend a helping hand or be there for everyone else... I have now come to realize that when it is all said and done, and I needed people to be there for me like I was for them..... let's just say the giving back hand was not really one I could grab onto. I am perfectly fine with that... Like I do not help people etc in hopes of the same help in return... I did what I did for others because that is who I am! I have a big heart, and I will give someone my last if I had to with no questions asked! However as I look around, and see where I am left, it is not in a good place... and for what? Because I was so caught up making sure everyone else was good I did not take the time out to make sure I was good! Truth be told I left myself in a shitty place... I am not hurting but I am not comfortable either... It is a live and you learn so to speak type lesson! I am just happy I am finally putting my foot down, and getting stuff back right! 

So I am sure you might be wondering what the "No New Friends" picture is about... Well..... hmm... Let me just say if I did not know before, I know now my worth, and some people just are not worth anymore of my time... DO NOT TAKE THIS WRONG, I am not degrading anyone in anyway! I just know right now I do not need rift raft people in my life, nor do I need any men all in my face, nor do I need drama from people! That is to everyone! FRIENDS, FAMILY, WORK, SOCIAL MEDIA, like I am not with it... OBVI I am doing something wrong because I say no drama, yet somehow I get caught up in it... So I am trying my best to eliminate all aspects of drama, and drama-filled people... 

Not only drama tho, people tend to grow apart, and go on their separate ways, which IT IS LIFE IT HAPPENS! I believe no matter how old you are you have room to grow, and some times within that room that you grow you realize that you do not like certain things, or that your views are different then others etc. NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT... I just, I am on a path to recovery, of my OWN PEACE OF MIND, and as selfish as this may sound I do not have time to try to help others figure out their path when I am still trying to figure out my own...

WHATEVS you live you LEARN you MOVE on! I have no worries in the choices I have yet made this year! I am very good with all of them! I have never again felt so free! like I know with this focus I am going to get a lot done this year and it is already such a relief!   

You know, I have been my own worst critic like I will hype myself up and tear myself down, and I ruin my own chances to open bigger doors for myself... Well I am done being scared, I am done knocking my own hopes and dreams out of the window! I am my OWN FAN! my OWN NUMBER ONE FAN!!! I can honestly say that this time I am not turning down nothing that can better me! I might be scared, but I am going to go through with everything! I am going to do what I need to do to be a better me for my won better future! I know I am going to have some HATERS but I am not worried! I am going to honestly pray for them, and hope they to will wake up and get their lives together, maybe one day they too will want better for themselves? Who Knows?! I just know that the HUNGER IS REAL and I am going to be GRINDING HARD THIS YEAR!!!! like no other!!! ALL WORK AND NO PLAY IT IS TIME!!!! No ONE is going to DO IT FOR ME!!! I gotta show up and SHOW OUT!!! and that is what I PLAN ON DOING!!!!! 

Like Always I really appreciate everyone who takes the time out to read my blogs! Some times their good, sometimes I am ranting but hopefully all in all some of these help people reach out and do what they need to do etc. THANK YOU!!! remember keep checking back! I try to write at least once a month! If your lucky it might be twice a month! Some months I feel more talkative than others! :) 

         Love Always Ariell!!!