So It is MID-JUNE ALREADY!?!?!

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So, it is mid-June already! 2015 is just flying by fast! 

This post like most of my posts will be a little bit of everywhere with my thoughts! I always say I am going to try and post at least once a month and it never actually happens...

BUT I think now I have come up with the perfect schedule to fit everything in!!! Since I have been working two jobs; one full time and on part time my life has been so crazy! lol 

Yet throughout this crazy I have planned on fitting the gym in almost daily, and doing a blog post at least once a month! I actually ever year buy a yearly planner to use, and every year I may use the planner for about half of the year and then do not pay it no mind. Unfortunately it is June so this is me using my planner half of the year... but I read some where that it only takes 30 days of routine consistent routine for that routine to become like second nature to a person. But I am not going to spill all my beans in the beginning of this post! So let's begin! 

As a lot of you know last December I lost one of the most important people to me... My Grandmother a.k.a Nana.

As a lot of you may not know I actually have issues with showing emotions, such as sadness, empathy,and sympathy. Yet I can be happy or mad real quick, however those other feelings I have issues dealing with. I also suffer from depression, and anxiety. So I do believe I have issues with being sad because I am scared it will lead me down a dark place. 

With all that being said, grieving for my nana has been a real challenge for me, here I am six months later and randomly finding myself in tears thinking about her. I thought as time goes on it will get easier, and I am sure it will...but for me it seems like as time goes on I am actually able to feel for my loss and grieve with tears... It has been hard and yet relieving all at once! I know Nana is still with all of us, and I know she is watching down on us from heaven... I took some time away from the world after she passed, I mean literally was in the house, didn't want to leave, was emotionally eating I actually went into depression after she passed. And it was rough for me because I did not understand what was happening to me and why I felt so low... and when I did realize it was my depression kicking my butt I had to try everything to pull myself out of it. 

THE HARDEST thing about dealing with anxiety and depression, is having to try and explain it to the people around you whom are not to familiar with what depression can really do to a person. It truly can be disabling, like hiding under a rock is all I wanted to do... But again I have issues showing those hurt feelings so for me when depression hits, I have to pretend everything is okay and act as normal as possible... and it is actually a lot harder then it sounds. I want to say from like late December to maybe April I felt like I was under water, I finally broke down and told someone closest to me what I was going through... and It was the best thing I could have done for me... he really helped pull me out of that funk. 

SO WHAT I WANT TO SAY IS DEPRESSION IS REAL ANXIETY IS REAL AND IF YOU ARE SUFFERING FROM IT PLEASE PLEASE TALK TO SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU! IT DOES HELP A LOT!!! DO NOT LET IT TAKE YOU DOWN THAT UGLY ROAD!!! YOU CAN EVEN REACH OUT TO ME AND I WILL DO ALL I CAN TO HELP! I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE CORNERED BY DEPRESSION!!! Just please reach out to a friend or a family member do not let it consume you!

  

Okay a lot of those who know me well know that I am very family orientated! I always have been and always will be! Some times being so family orientated is my biggest down fall! I still have so much faith and hope for my siblings, and what hurts the most is when we do not all get along. Nana took all of us in when our parents went to prison to make sure we all stayed together, she taught us that at the end of the day we are all we got. Our mom also made it very important to us that we all stick together and be there for one another... but it does not seem like that is what we are doing... I mean do not get me wrong I can call or text any of my siblings (on my moms side) at almost any given time and speak with them... but the definition of family means something different to each of us now that we are older... we all used to be on the same page about what family is... now everyone has their own definition and meaning of family... The day I realized that I honestly cried... my siblings are everything to me and I mean EVERYTHING... But I guess the older we become the different we become.. and our views, and morals start to change... and I have learned to accept that... I want nothing but the best for everyone! I want all of them to be happy and healthy and as long as they are only a phone call/text away and are happy and healthy I can live with that. Letting go is hard...

Earlier I mentioned how depression had me down and out for a little while, and I also mentioned having a planner that I was going to start putting to use in full effect! I have started writing in everything going on in my planner! Which for me has been extremely exciting, I am not sure if you all ever heard that it is better to write down goals, because once it is written it normally gets done? Or the saying is something along those lines lol! I truly agree with that, I feel like once I write stuff down, I am obligated to accomplish or do whatever it is I wrote down, and with it being written in my planner I have to see it for the whole month that I am in it has helped a lot. 

But since I was down and out for a few months I have a few things I have to take care of financially this month and get everything back right... then starting July I have the gym worked in, and my day to make a new blog post worked in!! and I'm praying that within 30days I can build a great routine, and keep everything running and working smoothly! I have to be my own motivation... Crazy to say it took me a long while to figure that out... I always have looked for others to motivate me in some way or another, and once that was gone I was kinda lost.... HOWEVER I have found the light... and I am hoping that I will be able to keep my light on and keep myself motivated.... At the end of the day no one can take better care of you THEN YOU!!!! 

Well that is the end of my post for today!! and like always THANKS FOR READING!!!!! 

February // Black History Month // Coming Soon //

February, such a wonderful short month. Most first thoughts are Valentine's Day, and Black History month! Which is I guess the normal for the this month! 

First and foremost I want to thank everyone who takes the time out of there day to read my blog!!! It means so much to me, you all are appreciated!!

Now on to Valentine's Day... Today which is 02/14/2015 I did a bunch of nothing! Mostly because my Valentine plans were yesterday in which I went to see Fifty Shades of Grey, and had dinner with my love. We will get in to Fifty Shades of Grey here in a moment, But I want to discuss Valentines day a bit more. I watched my facebook, and twitter closely today to see everyone post, to view every one's little babies all dolled up etc. I could not help but realize that Valentine's day has become yet another competition, who gets the most stuff who got what etc etc. To the point where even I was like "damn I was cheated mfs out here getting shoes and shit I just went to dinner and a movie." I had to stop and snap back into reality! I have never EVER been materialistic, not with my money or the next ones money... MONEY NOR THINGS can buy happiness, if your not happy your not happy and you can buy all the things in the world and you still will not be happy. 

Valentine's Day used to resemble romance, and love, and now it seems to just be another 'MY GIFTS/boy/girl/friend is better then yours or deal. 

SO I stand firm when I say I am happy to have exchanged beautiful card with my love and have a lovely outing! Because we however do not only show our love on one day but yet all year long!! 

I did enjoy seeing every one's children, the couples pics, and gifts today tho! It is nice to see love does still exist!   

 Black History Month!!! Man oh Man!! A little inside joke, I was always told I had to choose either the beginning or the end of February to celebrate, because I am only half black so I only get half the month lol!!!! It always made me laugh!!! 

      But on a more serious level... it sickens me to know that so many people gave there life's fighting for our rights to be free, to have equal rights to be considered humans at the very least...and to watch the hatred we all have towards one another etc. It makes me just really question why?! Like If Martin Luther King Jr. was here today he would honestly be pissed... There is so much rivalry being held against our own people. Like why are we not lifting each other up, rather then knocking each other down to get ahead? Racism is not something someone is born with it is taught on both sides!!!
        How can one say that white men have the power card etc, and yet in the same sentence one is teaching the younger youth to not like white people... AS LONG AS WE ARE KILLING EACH OTHER OFF WE STAND DIVIDED!!!! Like for real we need to STAND UNITED be strong for each other, and help each other out more... The consist competition etc is dumb you all look dumb like get it together we need to be together, and strong!!! Lets make a difference!!! Lets make MLK Jr. proud! Each change starts within us first though!!!

OMG OMG OMG, so I am not sure of how many people really know how I have always had a interest in ASL= American Sign Language! But I have always been very interested in it just never really acted on it. What drawn me further into ASL was I worked at a factory, and I met a women there who was Deaf, and I loved her she was kind, and patient... But I felt like the supervisors did not take the time needed during our huddles so that she could read their lips and know what was going on it made me feel some sort of way. Like she was just dis-guarded. So slowly but surely I taught my self the ASL alphabet and a few words I knew we used often at work, so I could help fill her in... We talked much! She gave me different sites, and books to go to to learn more ASL it was beautiful!! Secondly I'm a big ABC FAMILY NERD lol and ABC Family has a show called Switched At Birth, which one of the main characters is also deaf and there is alot of signing going on in the show so it also helps me learn different words etc...

ANYHOO I have been thinking long and hard about what is a job I would love to go to every day!! Like what do I love doing?!? Because Lord knows I find it hard to commit to things lol. Then it hit me I love signing like I love it so much, and I also LOVE helping people so what would be better then to become a Certified Interpreter!!   I looked into it and sure enough I start classes on Wednesday! And I am honestly so excited and nervous all at once!!!

However I have no doubt that this is not the road I should be taking and I am beyond blessed, and excited to start this new chapter!!! 

Okay before I end this little segment, I must discuss Fifty Shades of Grey!!! I have heard about the book forever it seems like, but never read it... I bought the whole series a few weeks back with my sister, and still I went to see the movie before I read the book... MANNNNNN that movie was everything! had me holding out my wrist ready to be taken to The Red Room of Pain lol... I am half way through the first book, and its GOOD so I suggest it to be a MUST READ SEE ETC... like I am sure no one will dislike this book... or MOVIE so if you haven already and you are looking for a good read FIFTY SHADES OF GREY!!! DO IT!!!! You will love it!!!

Now back to my coming soon!!! I am still doing research on the "Why people hate White women with Black Men" Blog I assure you it is almost finished and will be coming soon! I also have several other ideas for blogs. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY I would like to hear from the readers!!! What topics would you all like me to Discuss or write about!?? I have no issue bring out what is on demand!!! so hit my inbox let me know if there is any topics you all would like me to write about and I will!!! I keep my BLOG 100% I do not lie or what not, I say how I feel exactly!!! it is all me!! so Let me know lets make some stuff happen!!!! 

Until then here is a short list of upcoming topics you all should stay tuned!!

1. Why People hate White Women With Black Men

2. How Many is To Many? // Sexual

3. Sideline Chicks // Men 

4. Animal Food Bank Fundraiser!

5.Randomness LOTS OF RANDOMNESS

lol anyhoo thanks again everyone for reading!!! 

I SUCK AT THIS!!!

Okay, so every year I say I am going to post more on my blog! I have come to realize that I really suck at this!!! I'll post consistently for a little while, then BOOM nothing for months on end! its just I have so much to say, but then I have nothing at all to say! I guess I have to be for real when I say I am going to start being super open and honest with my blogs!

So you ask what is new in the neighborhood? SOOOOOOO much has happened and not so much has happened. First things first... I lost the love of my life my Nana 

Nana.... my Nana, she took us in when both my mother and father went to prison. And she did not have to! She could of let us go off to foster homes, but for her we stayed together as one family! Nana taught us what family meant, and she held us all together for so long! Like my cousin Mari said no matter what we did Nana was always so proud of us! She is greatly missed! It all happened so fast, I think i have still yet to fully process the fact that she is even gone!!! Almost a week after she passed, my mom had to do the unthinkable, and put to sleep my Nana's cat for he was deathly ill, and was suffering. It was very hard to lose the last little piece of Nana we all had left. But with me having Baby Monroe (my dog) I knew Skooter (Nana's cat) would not want to live much longer without is love my Nana. 

I have not been to fond of the new year new me spills, I honestly believe everyday is a new day for new beginnings! With that being said, Nana and my last real conversation was about how she loved my writing and I quote "I need to stop bullshitting, to finish and get a book published". See my issue has never been writing, my issue has been to finish one book! I also come up with these awesome story lines, and characters I get so far in my writing and I get stuck. But like I said prior Nana no matter what was always proud of us! This is something I want to and need to get serious about! Some times I just need that little push of motivation and support to get things done. I honestly think that I will be able to conquer this finishing a book issue now!!!! 

I was thinking long and hard about it, What person doesn't love a twisted love story?! I feel like we all fall victim to the happily ever afters and love stories!!! And believe me when I say I do believe I have just the one! The one story to tell and it just become a really huge hit!!! I am excited, and discouraged all at the same time!!! 

Just want to be right this year, with myself with my feelings, and most importantly and first of the list with God! I want to have a very humble year!!! 

Okay I think I spoke enough about stuff for this FIRST 2015 post!!! I am going to set reminders in my phone, so I can keep up with this!! But Im sure there will be some stuff you all will not agree with... LIKE IM DEF GONNA TACKLE THE HATE FOR BIRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS REAL SOON!! SO all of yall still mad about white women being with black men! yall are about to be more MAD!!!! 

Like Always Thanks for reading 

Interracial Dating Central

 What comes to mind when the words "Interracial Dating" has been spoken?

      Do you become happy? Sad? or have no feeling at all about it?

I come from a interracial relationship, my mother is white, and my father is African American. I am pretty sure the word they use for us is Mulatto. 

When you meet someone you are truly interested in, rather it is a friendship or a romantic relationship WHY SHOULD COLOR MATTER? It shouldn't matter at all, and honestly it does not matter. Yes some people are stupid and totally against interracial dating, but so what! Are you going to allow other people's opinions stop you from your own happiness? NO! 

I being mixed in all, I like guys from all races, because in all actuality the color of their skin or their nationality does not matter to me. All that matters in that the man is a good man, he will or does make me happy and we can go from there. However, I never really knew how to approach white men. I do not know why! I always get so nervous when I have to talk to a white man that I have a crush on. I guess it might have something to do with the fact that I grew up in a urban area. I mean do not get me wrong there were white people where I grew up. BUT none that I was interested in dating or had a crush on so it was no big deal talking to them.

And as I got older and move more around I then noticed I get really shy around white guys that I have a crush on. 

Now I know I have been rambling but I HAVE FOUND THE KEY!!! There is this website called Interracial Dating Central! www.interracialdatingcentral.com

Which I am sure you all could have guessed by the BIG PICTURE AT the top of this page. 

But back to the point, this website is designed to help all of us who might be shy, or want to start slow with meeting new people. This website allows us to communicate with different SINGLE men and women of all different nationalities it lets you test the waters! And it brings people who are just as interested as you are to date outside of your own race together!!! 

So for me as an example, like I said for some reason I am really nervous around hot white men, I could easily join Interracial Dating Central, and start talking to a white man, and be able to connect with him on a more personable level so when we are in public I do not freeze up like a kid just seeing santa for the first time. 

Our lives are so hectic, and we do not have time to play the guessing game on if he/she likes me or if they do not! It is 2014 and so many people have met their soul mates online! So now here is your chance!!!

Go check out the site! Make an account explore! The site is very user friendly, and you can read all their success stories on their home page! 

Now is the time to take control, and go after whoever it is your are interested in!!! LOVE HAS NO COLOR!!!!

www.interracialdatingcentral.com

January 2014! Time to get RIGHT with MYSELF!!!

Everyone has their New Year resolutions, or their "New Year, New Me" spills. This year I told myself I would not partake in any of that! I do not want to set goals, that are not realistic, nor do I want to make promises to myself that I know I will not keep! So instead I have decided, that I am going to learn to become at peace within myself! It is something that I need to do! FOR ME!!! I have never been so excited to start any sort of process more than I am excited right now about starting this one!

 

Now, I have always said time, and time again that I would start saving. Yet I never seem to do it. I mean I come up with these plans "budget plans" to save, but somehow I fail them every time! I said somehow because at first I did not understand why I could make the perfect budget for everyone else, yet I couldn't make one for myself. NOW I ave realized in a budget you must include everything, like gas, food, medicine, pet expenses etc. My butt would just make a budget for saving, and my bills... then wonder why nothing every worked or why I never had food etc. I mean it is simple stuff that I left out because I did not think it would be that important to add... Well I am going to say that EVERYTHING you spend your money on NEEDS TO BE IN YOUR BUDGET (if your creating one) if not your budget will always fail like mine did! 

I have a lot coming up and a lot going on in these next few months so I want this budget to work so that I can handle what I need to and do what I need to financially! I am really taking this year and devoting all my hard earned pennies to getting my life back on track, I was focused, and then I got lost... NOW I AM MORE FOCUSED THAN EVER!!! Let ME TELL YOU IT IS OFFICIALLY GRIND TIME!!!! 

 Anyone who know's me well, KNOWS that I have been putting basically my life on hold to lend a helping hand or be there for everyone else... I have now come to realize that when it is all said and done, and I needed people to be there for me like I was for them..... let's just say the giving back hand was not really one I could grab onto. I am perfectly fine with that... Like I do not help people etc in hopes of the same help in return... I did what I did for others because that is who I am! I have a big heart, and I will give someone my last if I had to with no questions asked! However as I look around, and see where I am left, it is not in a good place... and for what? Because I was so caught up making sure everyone else was good I did not take the time out to make sure I was good! Truth be told I left myself in a shitty place... I am not hurting but I am not comfortable either... It is a live and you learn so to speak type lesson! I am just happy I am finally putting my foot down, and getting stuff back right! 

So I am sure you might be wondering what the "No New Friends" picture is about... Well..... hmm... Let me just say if I did not know before, I know now my worth, and some people just are not worth anymore of my time... DO NOT TAKE THIS WRONG, I am not degrading anyone in anyway! I just know right now I do not need rift raft people in my life, nor do I need any men all in my face, nor do I need drama from people! That is to everyone! FRIENDS, FAMILY, WORK, SOCIAL MEDIA, like I am not with it... OBVI I am doing something wrong because I say no drama, yet somehow I get caught up in it... So I am trying my best to eliminate all aspects of drama, and drama-filled people... 

Not only drama tho, people tend to grow apart, and go on their separate ways, which IT IS LIFE IT HAPPENS! I believe no matter how old you are you have room to grow, and some times within that room that you grow you realize that you do not like certain things, or that your views are different then others etc. NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT... I just, I am on a path to recovery, of my OWN PEACE OF MIND, and as selfish as this may sound I do not have time to try to help others figure out their path when I am still trying to figure out my own...

WHATEVS you live you LEARN you MOVE on! I have no worries in the choices I have yet made this year! I am very good with all of them! I have never again felt so free! like I know with this focus I am going to get a lot done this year and it is already such a relief!   

You know, I have been my own worst critic like I will hype myself up and tear myself down, and I ruin my own chances to open bigger doors for myself... Well I am done being scared, I am done knocking my own hopes and dreams out of the window! I am my OWN FAN! my OWN NUMBER ONE FAN!!! I can honestly say that this time I am not turning down nothing that can better me! I might be scared, but I am going to go through with everything! I am going to do what I need to do to be a better me for my won better future! I know I am going to have some HATERS but I am not worried! I am going to honestly pray for them, and hope they to will wake up and get their lives together, maybe one day they too will want better for themselves? Who Knows?! I just know that the HUNGER IS REAL and I am going to be GRINDING HARD THIS YEAR!!!! like no other!!! ALL WORK AND NO PLAY IT IS TIME!!!! No ONE is going to DO IT FOR ME!!! I gotta show up and SHOW OUT!!! and that is what I PLAN ON DOING!!!!! 

Like Always I really appreciate everyone who takes the time out to read my blogs! Some times their good, sometimes I am ranting but hopefully all in all some of these help people reach out and do what they need to do etc. THANK YOU!!! remember keep checking back! I try to write at least once a month! If your lucky it might be twice a month! Some months I feel more talkative than others! :) 

         Love Always Ariell!!!

Why I NOW understand WHY SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE is WRONG.

 Okay, So we have learned or heard all our lives that sex before marriage is wrong, and that we should wait until we are married...
             I always thought that was so CRAZY especially after I started having sex... I was like there is no way people should wait to experience something so beautiful....
                                    But now that I am older I completely understand, Sex is a very powerful act. A very powerful display of emotion. The act its self should be shared between people whom actually care about each other....

I've heard endless people say sex is okay as long as you know not to catch feelings... But my question is HOW DO YOU NOT CATCH feelings for someone you just gave a piece of yourself  to?

Like honesty each time you have sex with someone your literally giving them a piece of yourself that YOU CAN NEVER GET BACK!! Why give yourself to someone whom doesnt genuinely care about you? 

For example, think of all the men or women you had sex with, if you were terminally ill or died tomorrow would they be at your funeral? Would they even give a damn that your sick or that you died? SOME MIGHT but MOST OF THEM WON'T because at the end of the day you were just a good FUCK (if they even considered you to be GOOD). 

I am going to be COMPLETELY honest here, I found myself catching feelings for men that I have slept with knowing these feelings are not genuinely there... It is very confusing, I started to feel like I had way more emotions towards people then I actually did... 

                                        Which is why sex should really be with someone you care about whom cares about you... Now I know were not all going to wait until we are married especially those of us whom have had sex, and have seen how beautiful it really is... BUT JUST BE MORE WARY of the people you choose to be with. Do not BE SOMEONES TROPHY piece of ASS... Do not allow these men or women to take pieces of your soul just so they can brag to the next man or women about "being with you". Stop allowing these men or women to make you believe they care about you so that you will sleep with them when they damn well do not care anything about you! 

I tell my sisters all the time just because you've had sex that does not mean you HAVE to have sex with every person you come across! and it is TRUE just because were SEXUALLY ACTIVE does NOT MEAN WE NEED TO HAVE SEX WITH EVERYONE... it doesn't AND I REFUSE to keep allowing men to enter my personal temple and take pieces of my gold just for the hell of it... naw BRAH I am not with it...  

 Now I am not saying that I am judging people who are having sex before marriage I am not judging nor am I telling anyone to stop having sex, I am clearly stating that I understand why I was told all my life I should wait until were married... It took me long enough to get the point... At one point I did not feel like I carried any feelings for the person I was active with, when I was younger I thought I loved almost every guy lol, and then I did not care at all. I guess as time progresses I am starting to see the real nature and emotions behind the act, and I am starting to see why it is so important to wait for the right person to give yourself to. 
    I do not care what no one says I feel like all women at least if not men too but all women go through a promiscuous stage, and did things we might not be proud of.. AGAIN I AM GOING TO BE HONEST WITH ALL MY BLOGS. 

So when I was like 15-16-17 those I would have to say were my toughest years, I was lost, and unsure of what I wanted and where I was going, and I was sleeping around... I felt like at that moment in my life that was the only thing I could control was how I partied and who I slept with... Now DO NOT GET ME WRONG... I was NOT JUST OUT THERE sleeping with everyone it was not OUT OF CONTROL... but now when I look at it it really was, I'll say within those three years I probably slept with 5-7 guys. Which is not a lot. BUT THE FUCK 15-17 MY ASS should not have been sleeping with no one... AT ALL!!!   I however do not regret the choices I choosed to make... I regret not understanding the power of sex, and how valuable it is, and how I can never get back what I allowed these men to have. But from every experience is a lesson learned... 

I am very grateful that throughout those years I did not get and std's, nor did I wine up with children. At least I was smart enough to use condoms. 

The moral of my story is,.. Sex IS A VERY POWERFUL ACT, and if your single... save yourself until your married or in a serious relationship... if your STILL A VIRGIN WAIT WAIT!!! I SWEAR sex is so much better when it is between two people whom both care deeply about each other... We ALL HAVE skeletons, I know who I am today and I do not allow myself to be judged based on my pass... I am not that 15-17 year old girl anymore, nor am I that 19, 20, 21 girl... I am me, I might be different tomorrow... WHO KNOWS but what I do know is I am worth the wait, and if mfs really care about me then they will RESPECT ME and will wait... and if they choose not to then they DONT CARE... were all worth more! KNOW YOUR WORTH PEOPLE... stop giving yourself away... waiting will be worth it...

So My vow today is, I am going to wait...I am single, and until I am on the right path with the right man my GOODIES will be kept in their bag! I need to be with someone who cares about me... not someone who is looking for a quick nut, or a quick fix, and I do not need to be looking for that either... 

December 2013! Hello

December is here!!! Christmas TIME!!! SEASON GREETINGS!!!! TIS' THE SEASON ETC! 


I cannot believe the end of 2013 is here, OMG! SO much has happened this year! 

        I am happy to get ready for Christmas, and New Years tho! I always TURN UP for New Years with my Best friend TIA we always have a good time! Christmas this year should be good too all of my siblings are supposed to be together for Christmas, so it should be fun and interesting. 

                     However I do have some things on my mind to address... I am getting older every year... And the less time I have to waste.... MEANING ALL DRAMA family, friend, fb, work ETC I do not want any part of... it is only wasting my time, and I do not have much time left to waste... Like Im not where I need or want to be in my life right now, so I will be damned if I waste anymore time with bullshit....

       With our family and friends we need to learn where to draw the line in their personal lifes. Like of course we all want the best for our family, and friends... we all want the people we associate with to carry themselves a certian way, but we cannot make anyone do anything!

      I will not get into relationship issues that do not directly affect my life, NOW I MIGHT GIVE A COMMENT or put my FEEDBACK in the situation but I am not going to full blown argue with ANYONE about THEIR RELATIONSHIPS.... its not my business... WHy get all worked up about what the next mf is doing in their relationship... they gone do what they want to do I cannot nor will not even try to control it... Its not my relationship its not my life... 

    Their is a fine line you can cross when referencing friends/family's relationships... I know where the line is and I choose not to cross it because it is not my business...

That does NOT MEAN I am okay with a situation or I do not care that it has happened but I am not going to waste my energy being upset about it... I can't I do not have time for it... 

This is the END OF 2013 I want to end it on a POSITIVE NOTE WITH MY SIBLINGS that is all, I am ready for the NEW YEAR, and I am hoping to get alot of things accomplished for 2014 so that I am OWN 2015!!!! yes I am being optimistic very but hey there is alot of things I HAVE TO GET DONE, and I am HOPING within 2014 everything will get done!!!! 

TIS THE SEASON!!!!